Human beings are social creatures and we seek to build those social ties as quickly and efficiently as possible. Without the force of numbers, we would never have survived the desert, and together we have come a long way.

But if the result is the social gathering, what was the cause? What drives people to attract and, more importantly, to stick together?

“We will always have Paris”

The question of what unites people in a social group is not new. It has just been reformulated. Why do two people, complete strangers, become friends? Why would two enemies unite? How do two people fall in love?

These are all social events, so it should come as no surprise that your answers are tied to our own question. The same thing that brings people together in everyday life is the same thing that brings people together in online social circles: experience.

Common interests and values ​​are important aspects, yes, but experience is what allows even complete opposites of personality to come together. More important still is how a greater number of people, who are so varied and different that they hardly have anything in common, are able to unify under a single banner.

Common experience is that common thread and, sometimes, it is the only thing that different individuals share. Even if a group eventually disperses, they will always remember that time, that incident. And if they were ever to mention it again, anyone else who also experienced that event would instantly recognize it.

These two fragments of that long-lost mob can now revel together in nostalgia for the event, and the fact that they can share that memory sets them apart from all the others who weren’t present. Two acquaintances can be more together in this way than even with their respective lovers. That is the power of experience.

“That one time, at Band Camp …”

Inside jokes are another example of this. Or funny memories that only amuse the people who were there, one of those “you had to be there” moments. Internet memes thrive on shared experience, themselves being a type of inside joke.

“What happens in Las Vegas, stays in Las Vegas” is now a pact between friends. Saving someone from drowning in a restaurant unites the savior and the saved, not out of a necessarily moral obligation, but simply because they shared a common experience. “Do you remember that time you saved me / I saved you?”

Much of viral marketing is based on this notion of experience as a binding agent. When the viral campaign becomes big enough, it becomes an “event” in itself. People start participating in it simply to be part of the experience; even if they had little or no knowledge of what it is for. Anyone who misses out on participating in the viral experience is just that, someone who missed out on someone’s fun.

“I was there, man”

Social media has become the bulletin board for people to catch and bump into other people with similar experiences.

Everyone who tweeted during a crisis is linked in some way by the fact that all of these faceless fellow commenters also suffered the same disaster as them. Even the mere chance of an “epic thread”, or a series of long-running comments fueled by some interesting discussion, becomes very memorable; even spawning friendships afterward as a result.

Two individuals experiencing the same adventure may find themselves bound by it; simply because they were the only ones who felt what the whole ordeal was like and that is something that no one else can understand. This can happen to hikers, adventurers, and two people who later fall in love with it.

Likewise, when a couple stops having new experiences with each other, they can start to get bored and stagnate, and without that new bonding glue they start to part. A new experience can keep a relationship strong, because it is a new experience for the participants in that relationship to live together and interact later.

Anyone who has seen a movie with a lot of plot understands this; They can only talk about it with other people who have seen that movie as well. Even if revealing spoilers wasn’t a problem, simply retelling the cinematic experience isn’t enough. Unless the other person has had the experience of watching the movie like you, any attempt to relate the feeling of the moment to them just feels lacking and uncomfortable.

Forge relationships, build communities

In social media marketing, the old rules of advertising don’t always apply. You can’t just “advertise” someone; no one is on Facebook to read. People are on Facebook to share their own experiences and feast on the experiences of others. Social marketing is about participating in this social game, as a partner and not as a stranger.

So if the goal of social marketing is to link people to the brand / product, not only to attract loyal followers but also to retain them, how can we do it? Through experience. The experience is the real heart of the viral campaign, but not all experiences have to be viral. A smart ad, shared on social media, becomes an “event” in itself; in this case it is an inside joke. It’s something to bond with others while standing around the water cooler. It’s … a Commercial Superbowl.

Give your audience an experience and they will leave with an impression, something really impressed on them. Now it has given you something that you can use to identify with others, and even better now that you have this common experience, it sets you apart from others who do not share the same impression.

Now you have a click, an exclusive club. And if people want to join that club, they will have to subscribe to your brand / product to be part of that experience. This is why commercial ads on YouTube can still get so much success; This is why some people prefer to watch the Superbowl commercials rather than the big game itself.

Perhaps the most rewarding part is that if the experience you provided to the audience was memorable enough, that fond memory can later become an icon.

This is how brands achieve longevity and make their way into social consciousness.

The complete experience

Because you can bring people together and then link them to your product / brand, experience is one of the most subtle and powerful tools in any marketing arsenal. Thrive like never before on the web because social media was built on pretty much that same foundation.

When executed correctly, the experience of a successful campaign can put a narrow and loyal audience right in your hands. And with that binding agent, people can retain a part of the campaign within themselves for a long time. In terms of branding and awareness, there is nothing better for the task.

What are some of your favorite experiences and how did they fit you? Do you think that the experience of participating in a viral campaign or ARG (augmented reality game) really cemented you in that community of users?