It is surprising to the opposing party or the target how the High Conflict Personality (HCP) is able to win in court most of the time. This is because Family Court relies on the art of persuasion. The party that can persuade the judge to believe your story is the one that will prevail. People with personality disorders are extremely adept at the art of persuasion because they have had many years of practice. This puts them at an advantage.

The general way that people persuade each other is based on a variety of factors:
1. The attractiveness of the person
2. How aggressive are they
3. How confident are they
4. The amount of arguments they make.
5. The intensity of your language
6. The use of smaller words and shorter sentences.
7. Use distractions
8. Your relationship with the person you are trying to persuade.
9. Your emotional appeal

When it appears that the judge, in the Family Court case, is not believing the HCP’s case, they will change the subject and increase their emotional intensity. This is especially effective because healthcare professionals often lose control of what the facts really are, relying on their emotions to make their case heard and believed. Health professionals have developed highly effective skills in this area so that they can more easily manipulate the presiding judge into believing their side of the story.

People with HCP are very good actors and Family Court is a giant stage for them. While the low-conflict person relies on calm and truthful testimony to make the judge believe their case, the HCP uses techniques such as dramatic patterns of speech, crying, body movements, and nonstop talking to help their drama unfold. Judges are drawn to these because they can relate to them. They are part of the interpersonal commitment. The dramatic presentation of the HCP is remembered much longer than the rational, fact-based presentation of a reasonable person.

Healthcare professionals may even label the other parent with phrases such as neglect, indolent, abusive, and inappropriate parent. These words may have nothing to do with the case or have facts to support the words, but if used repeatedly with emotion, they stay in the mind of the presiding judge.

Knowing HCPs and how they can manipulate people is the first step in understanding, identifying, and stopping HCP behaviors before and after entering the Family Court arena.